Your Christmas Dinner in numbers
Tis the season to eat a lot of yummy food, so Wise has teamed up with the food-and-culture expert and Chef, Mallika Basu as part of our Christmas Without...
We've teamed up with personal finance expert, Kia Commodore to help give your money a kick up the backside so you can go ahead and sleep. “Lazy Money” basically sits in your account doing absolutely nothing. No returns on your savings is not a vibe.
So, in honour of our campaign, and to inspire you to do less while your money does the MOST, I’ve had a word with the chillest dudes in the animal kingdom on how they get Wise with their money.
God, that sounds so lame. I hope none of my friends read this. Or potential boyfriends. Plural.
CTA Learn about lazy money
Slow, sluggish and sassy, the classy tree-hanging rainforest don knows how to self-care. Their money goes towards deluxe manicures and pedicures to keep those four inch claws intact. Bet you didn’t know Sloths can swim? Well, they can, and it’s luxury French swimwear from Vilebrequin or nothing at all.
Fast fashion isn’t for them but fast money is. They use Wise’s multi-currency account to send money at top speed so they can keep their clothes chic and fly over the Kardashian’s nail technician to keep their claws clean.
8/10
Panda’s spend ten to sixteen hours of their day eating. Needless to say, there isn’t time for much else and most of their cash gets splashed on Deliveroo and Whole Foods groceries. Panda or not, we can all relate to the takeout tax. Thank goodness there aren’t Pret A Manger’s in central China's Mountain ranges.
All the noshing means they don’t spend money on anything else to be honest. But to avoid eating all of their money away (lol) they use Wise Jars, putting money aside each month for takeouts, treats and all things of the tasty variety.
7/10
Koalas sleep about eighteen hours a day, which makes a decent mattress topper and comfy set of pyjamas a must. They only eat leaves, specifically eucalyptus leaves, from their local farmers’ market. Sounds healthy, but sadly, their love of eucalyptus is what makes them so sleepy. The toxins in their 500g of leaves a day diet requires regular trips to a dietician. And boy oh boy do those costs pile up.
They’re too busy sleeping to focus on finances and haven’t finished setting up their Wise account. I’d throw some shade right about now, but they’re too cute. So I’m going to give them a sympathy rating.
10/10
These chilled dudes and dudettes bask in the beautiful lakes and rivers of sub-Saharan Africa. Sixteen hours of their day are dedicated to basking time, but at night is when they really come alive. They walk for hours looking for late-night snacks and the coolest spots in town. Concert tickets, guestlist spots, and over-priced cocktails put a dent in their wallets.
Their best asset’s their dance moves, and *Wise Interest and Stocks help their money grow while they put on their choreographed show.
6/10
Why are house cats so chill? Because they don’t have to do anything. We run around after them like they’re celebs and we’re mere mortals, unworthy of their presence. No spending needed. We’ll cover all of the costs. Take whatever. We don’t care. Please just like us. PLEASE.
Don’t need to
Doesn’t matter
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*Extra psst on Wise Interest and Stocks Interest and Stocks are offered through Wise Assets UK Ltd / Wise Assets Europe AS. Past performance doesn’t guarantee growth and capital may be at risk.
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